Married With Nothing In Common?

You'll soon know who is the idiot in my marriage!

Sharing with you an argument Dan and I had many years ago and the wise way he brought me to my senses.

"We have nothing in common!" I cried out, exhausted, discouraged, probably a bit angry about something that didn't go my way.

My sweet man responded with a gentle answer. "Sit down and I'll show you what we have in common. He found our wedding album, opened it and said,

"We have this day in common. We made the same vows. We have those promises in common. In fact, I'm going to say them to you again right now. And he did.

Then, he picked up our family photo album.

"We have these children in common. We both love them and want what is best for them."

Calmed, I forgot about my silliness and smiled at the man who chose to share life with me. Yes indeed, we did have a lot in common.

The next time you think you and your honey are miles apart, take a tip from my hubby and journey through the photo album.

Of course, this won't work for serious issues that need to be discussed, but for the day-to-day-I'm-too-tired-to-deal-with-life spat, reminiscing works swell.

Need a splash of serenity on your marriage? Enjoy those wedding photos on a dreary day.

Protecting Your Marriage From Sexual Misconduct

When My husband Dan started a secular job over forty years ago, his boss took him aside and whispered the names of women in the office he could have sexually. Dan walked away and kept his eyes, his hands, and his mind on the work he was hired to do.  Never before had the in-your-face wickedness of the world so threatened our marriage. When the office Christmas party invitation arrived on Dan's desk, he was told "Spouses not invited."

"I don't go to parties without my wife." Dan explained to his co-workers and to me. 

We went to the party together. I was the only spouse at a celebration of Christmas which included dinner, dancing, drinking, and too much coziness between co-workers.

The next Christmas we attended the dinner/dance/drink and were happy to see that this time a few others ignored the "No Spouses Invited" rule and brought their mates.

When we take a stand for marriage, others join us. Won't you?

Sexual misconduct can be blatant and it can be subtle. 

A wink of an eye. 

A lingering touch. 

A flirtatious glance. 

A conversation too personal for anyone but your spouse.  

Protecting yourself and your marriage from the damage of sexual misconduct requires setting guidelines for your life and living by them. 

Rev. David Linn, District Superintendent for the Christian and Missionary Alliance, offers the following common sense advice for keeping your marriage bed and your ministry pure (bold emphasis mine):

"1. Avoid all actual sins whether outward or in thought life. This is where the real battle is fought, as Paul wrote: “No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it. Therefore, my beloved, flee from idolatry” (1 Cor. 10:13-14). Run from it, reveal your struggle to an accountability partner, put barriers in the way, restructure your life pattern, work in larger groups, or whatever necessary. Repent every time you fail and receive forgiveness. No excuses. Don’t ever tell yourself: This little sin really doesn’t matter.

2. Do everything you can in public. Take away the enhanced temptation of private space wherever possible. Hire a carpenter to put windows in church classrooms and office doors. Meet outside or over video chat if that helps. Make your own choices about this. Don’t merely follow what others do.

3. Observe personal space. Approach others with a measure of wise caution and watch for cues about what is comfortable for them. Everyone is different. Adjust as necessary. It doesn’t really matter what is comfortable for you.

 4. Kindly and assertively tell others what you want and do not want. 

5. If you are married, follow the cautions and reservations your spouse expresses about your relationships without hesitation or reservation. Whatever your loved one says goes, even if you do not understand it. You probably won’t. 

6. Respect the holy life patterns of others. Some do not wish to eat out together in twosomes, travel together, or minister together. You and I have no access to the inward history and life of others. It is their prerogative to make those decisions. Love your brothers and sisters by following their wishes without complaint. The expansion of the kingdom of God will not be slowed by wise and holy living.

7. Never let down your guard. Be prepared for temptations to come your way from both non-churched and churched people, both men and women. There is no genuinely safe space on earth. “Therefore let him who thinks he stands take heed that he does not fall” (1 Corinthians 10:12)."

 Sexual sin seems to make headlines daily. A few weak moments can destroy your marriage, your family, your ministry, your career, your finances, your children, your children's respect, your children's marriages. etc. etc. etc. 

The cost too high, the pain too deep, the damage irreplaceable.

Dan and I set boundaries for our marriage and we live by them. 

"Marriage should be honored by all, 

and the marriage bed kept pure, 

for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral."  

Hebrews 13:4 (NIV) 

Bring splashes of serenity to your marriage by never giving a glance to or thought of another person other than your spouse. Take that stand today. Please. For the glory of God and the honor of  your marriage!

Staying Best Friends After You Marry

 

"Today I marry my best friend"

announces many wedding invitations . 

It's easy to marry your best friend, 

but how do you stay best friends after you marry?  

May these thoughts on marriage and friendship encourage you to be that best friend every husband (and every wife) desires and deserves.

1. Friends are loyal. God warned us in James 3:2 (GWT) that "All of us make a lot of mistakes." Surprise! Your honey is not perfect. He and you will make mistakes. If you are his friend, you will be quick to stand by him and forgive. Remember that he didn't wake up this morning with this thought: Woo Hoo! I wonder how many mistakes I can make today! Mistakes are not on his to-do list, but loving him in spite of them should be on yours.

2. Friends are kind. I've been to a lot of weddings and I've never heard this vow: I promise to make a note of everything you do that bothers me and remind you of it as long as we both shall live. That is not what we promise, but is that what we do? Without considering the consequences, we spew out words we wish we could stuff back in our mouths. Friends should be safe havens from the unpleasant side of life. It's a tough world out there. We need to be tender. 

3. Friends are cheerleaders. A wife fulfills a role that no one else can — that of her husband's cheerleader.  When the world knocks your man down, you need to pick him up and cheer him on. I remember my Dan coming home late from a difficult meeting. I pummeled him with questions. "What decisions were made? How did you respond?" Poor guy. He left one anxiety-ridden meeting and came home to another. Instead, I should have offered him assurance of my love in the form of a kiss, an embrace, and perhaps his favorite ice cream. I realized this truth when Dan took me in his arms, held me, and gently spoke, "I really need you to be my wife, not my boss." Lesson learned.

4. Friends spend time together. Early in our marriage Dan suggested that two times a year we go away alone together. I balked because of the expense and the time away from our children. Dan insisted and Dan was right. Now married 42 years, I realize we are best friends today because we guarded our couple time. If your husband has a hobby, join in. Dan loves to golf. I learned to love golf too. We work to find entertainment we enjoy together. Date nights are non-negotiable because friends make time to be together.

5. Friends build each other up. It's sad that some girlfriends find pleasure belittling their husbands. I've heard these friendship-ruining and marriage-killing conversations.  Don't participate in this activity. Either change the subject ("Everybody say one thing they LOVE about their husband!") or change your friends. Best friends don't ridicule each other in public or in private. They build each other up.

So, did you marry your best friend? I hope so. And I pray your friendship glows as you grow in love and life together. It takes work and discipline and self-sacrifice and it's worth it.

May your married life be filled with splashes of serenity!

Dan and I Share the Better and the Worse of our 51 Years Together

Lots of great marriage help here as Dan and I share the ups and downs of married life. 

 

May your marriage be blessed!

How I Became an Author

Happy National Author's Day to all authors 

who battle with words

 so readers can sit on them, 

mull over and understand, 

be encouraged and filled with hope, and

 their world becomes a sweeter place.

My journey as an author is not typical. 

I never gave a thought to writing a story for the public to read.

I did keep journals though, in obedience to 

Psalm 102:18

"Write this down for the next generation 

so people not yet born will praise God."

Hiding my words in a file cabinet,

 I hoped one day they would be discovered by 

my grandchildren and

 their grandchildren and 

people not yet born will

know of my faith in Christ.

One Sunday my husband Dan preached a sermon on the 

Parable of the Talents (Matthew 25:14:30).

In that parable, 

the master is angry at the lazy servant who buried his talents.

While Dan preached, God spoke to my heart,

  What good are all your writings doing buried in your file cabinet if no one reads them? 

I knew I was to write a book, but 

how do you write a book?

You write! Spiritual thoughts entered my mind and I wrote. Long before blogs or social media, my writing piled up in my file drawer. With no idea where to go from here, I waited on God's direction.

He lead me to Montrose Bible Conference to check out a retreat center for a marriage seminar Dan and I were planning. There on the table I noticed a brochure advertising the Montrose Christian Writer's Conference (MCWC). A writer's conference? Who knew? I didn't! Dan urged me to attend and the following summer I sat as a student at the Montrose Christian Writer's Conference.

Step by step, God unfolded my writing career. I share with you how God took me through stumbles and great strides.  

1.Start writing! You won't be published if you don't write.

2. Attend a writer's conference and learn the writing/publishing/marketing business. Keep attending conferences where you create a network of editors, agents, publishers, other writers who will encourage you on your journey.

3. Read books on writing. My favorites are On Writing Well by William Zinsser and Elements of Style by E. B. White and William Strunk Jr.

4. Publish a magazine article. I brought one of my devotionals to my first writer's conference and showed it to the editor of Salvation Army's War Cry. "I want this. I'll buy it." Her words rang shock and joy in my heart. 

5. Publish in a compilation. Gloria Clover attended Montrose Christian Writer's Conference as a member of the faculty. She published a sweet book titled Penned From the Heart which was a compilation from various authors. I showed her fifteen of my devotionals and she published all fifteen.

6. Write from your heart. I knew I was to write, but I didn't know what I was to write. A faculty member at MCWC said "Write what you are passionate about." I laughed and realized I was passionate about relaxing in my bath and being a good mother.  

7. Splashes of Serenity: Bathtime Reflections for Drained Moms was published a few years later. (Publication with a traditional publication company can take years to produce. Be prepared to wait.) Within months, Splashes of Serenity was in all the Family Christian book stores. 

8. When your first book sells well, publishers want another book. A sequel, Splashes of Serenity: Bathtime Reflections for Drained Wives, was published. I love this book, but it never got off the ground. Within weeks of publication, the publisher retired and Drained Wives was never promoted. Be prepared for some heartbreak as an author. Drained Wives remains one of my favorite books. I still hear from wives and husbands whose marriages were changed when they read our marriage story in Splashes of Serenity: Bathtime Reflections for Drained Wives. 

9. People who read Splashes of Serenity: Bathtime Reflections for Drained Wives urged me to write more on marriage. I thought I was done with writing (after the disappointment of Drained Wives), but  God wasn't done with me. Words, stories, chapter titles filled my head and would not leave. You writers know the feeling. I had to write We All Married Idiots: Three Things You Will Never Change About Your Marriage and Ten Things You Can. Wow! What a book! I had a publisher who worked hard and believed in me and in Idiots. Ha! He could relate! 

 Within days of publication I heard from an International Worker in South America who read  Idiots on her kindle and asked if she could translate it into Spanish.

Soon, International Workers from Bosnia/Herzegovina asked if they could translate We All Married Idiots into Bosnian. What a delight and a surprise seeing this work help marriages around the world. 

10. Leukemia! God gave me another surprise! He continues to fill me with hope, purpose, ministry, and words as I travel with cancer. Praise the Lord and Pass the Chemo: A Hopeful Response to a Hard Reality shares the lessons God taught me on my cancer journey. What joy hearing from other cancer patients the hope and peace they discover within the pages of Praise the Lord and Pass the Chemo.

Will I write another book? Only if the Lord leads. When words begin replacing sleep, and I am miserable until I get the words on paper, then I know God has another book in the works.    

Thank you, dear readers, for your prayers, love, and support. Thank you for writing reviews and for sharing my posts on social media. My only goal is to glorify God, to live a Holy life, to be obedient to His will, and to share Christ with the world. You partner with me in that endeavor and I am thankful for you. 

Happy Reader's Day to you from this Happy Author!

  

Our Journey With Covid — Separation

Crushed.  Dan, who always protects, provides, and cares for me, felt helpless to care for me now.

Thank You, Lord, for facetime. We talked and talked and talked. Both of us knew the outcome of my bout with covid-19 may end in a funeral. Dan and I spoke words of love and thanksgiving we needed to say. How thankful I am for that opportunity. Those who die suddenly, never get a good-bye. We said good-bye. We planned my funeral (my idea, not Dan's). We laughed, we cried, we prayed, we sang. We held on to each other and clung to God together in heart, if not in body. We hoped. We trusted. We treasured our time.

Daily, Dan drove to the hospital so he could be as close to me as possible. Parked in the hospital parking lot, he cried out to God for my healing. He fasted and prayed for days. 

"The Covidland Casanova (as the nurses referred to Dan) delivered a daily gift to me, via the reception desk in the hospital lobby.  

Yes. We were separated, but in many ways we were closer than ever. We knew nothing could separate us from our love for each other or our love for God. The day we wed we became one. Oneness can not become two. 

"For I am convinced that

neither death nor life,

neither angels nor demons,

neither the present nor the future,

nor any powers,

neither height nor depth,

nor anything else in all creation,

will be able to separate us from

the love of God that is in

Christ Jesus."

Romans 8:38-39

As covid-19 invaded my lungs, Dan's love for me and my love for him filled our hearts. Oh, shame on us for ever taking for granted or overlooking the sweetness of married love and the speediness of life lived not treasuring every moment.

 Open your eyes, lovers! 

Let go of the stupid stuff that irritates.*   

Enjoy each other!

 Play!

 Laugh! 

Don't live with regrets. 

Don't wait! 

Love strong! 

Love deep! 

Love now!

*My book, We All Married Idiots: Three Things You Will Never Change About Your Marriage and Ten Things You Can, will help you esteem your spouse as a gift to treasure, not as an idiot to tolerate.

Happy loving!

55 Reasons Why We're Still Kissing 55 Years Later

"So they are no longer two, but one flesh.

Therefore what God  has joined together, let no man separate."

Matthew 19:6 NIV

Wow! Celebrating 55 years married to the most wonderful man in the world. How blessed we are to love and enjoy these years together. 

We didn't get it right all of the time. In fact, if you read We All Married Idiots, you'll understand there were times we almost threw our marriage away. I'm so glad we remained true to the vows we spoke through our happy tears 55 years ago. When the hurting tears came, our vows to God and to each other were the glue keeping our frayed marriage together.

As we celebrate our 55th Anniversary, I jotted down 55 ways (in no particular order) we got it right. In  hopes one will touch your heart and bless your marriage, I share them with you.

     1. Read your wedding vows and repeat to each other often.

     2. Go to bed at the same time whenever possible. The late-night pillow talk was precious and sometimes the only time we were alone during a busy day.

     3. Make intimacy a priority.

     4. Our marriage took priority over our children. We cherished our daughters and son and they knew they were loved. They also knew mom and dad loved each other, which brought joy and balance to our family.

     5. Be polite. My husband opened the car door for me when we dated and on our wedding day. He still does today. Those little courtesies mean a lot and speak volumes to our children.

     6. Date frequently. Your children will survive and thrive knowing mommy and daddy are going out just the two of them. Your child's greatest fear is that their parents will divorce. Seeing the two of you leave to enjoy each other may bring tears in the short run, but smiles for a lifetime.

     7. Vacation as a family. When you vacation together, you bond as a family. When another family is included in your plans, the kids bond with the other kids and not with each other or to their parents. An occasional vacation with friends is fun, but not every year.

     8. Overnight as a couple. Dan set as a priority that two weekends a year we get away together. I once said, "We can't afford this." He replied, "It's cheaper than a divorce." Dan was right.

     9. Your friends should never be more important than your spouse.

    10. Serve together at church or in the community. Find something you can do to work as a team.

    11. Discover activities and fun you can enjoy as a couple. I learned to love golf.

    12. Go on dates alone. Don't always go with another couple.

    13. Read Christian books on marriage. 

    14. Keep going to marriage retreats. This can be one of your weekends away.

    15. Your bedroom is your love sanctuary. Keep it clean and tidy and beautiful.

    16. Play romantic music and light candles. Make your home and your bedroom a retreat you both want to escape to.

    17. Do chores together. Raking leaves and shoveling snow is more fun as a twosome or a family.

    18. Seek ways to make each other's life better. Ask yourself What can I do to make my honey happy today.

    19. Celebrate big! Birthdays, Anniversaries, holidays are memory creators and make life fun.

    20. Be flexible. A rigid spouse is not very huggable.

    21. Practice kindness. Please and thank you never grow old. Kind people smile. So, smile. A lot.

    22. Be patient. Spouses and marriages need time to grow up.

    23. Consider your spouse before you consider yourself.

    24. Romance never grows old! Be creative and romantic and fun!

    25. Be content. Be happy with the person you married.

    26. Build your spouse up. Don't push or nag.

    27. Show and tell your spouse they are the most important person in your world.

    28. Plan surprises!

    29. Look nice at home and in bed.

    30. Sit close.

    31. Be present for big events whether a sick bed or a job promotion.

    32. Pray for each other. Pray for your marriage.

    33. Hold on during the bad times.

    34. Disagree, but don't disrespect.

    35. Choose your battles. Let go of the little irritations that don't matter.

    36. Hold hands.

    37. Fight fair. Stick to the subject of the dispute and never attack the person.

    38. Forgive and forget. Remember, we all make mistakes.

    39. Your spouse is not God, so don't expect perfection.

    40. Encourage their dreams.

    41. Avoid immorality of all kinds by watching and reading only uplifting, pro-marriage movies and television.

    42. Choose your friends wisely.

    43. Seek advice and counselling from Bible-believing, Godly pastors and friends.

    44. Remember: This too will pass. What upsets you today may be forgotten tomorrow.

    45. Leave your parents and cleave to your spouse.

    46. Live, act, and speak like a married person. Leave your single life behind.

    47. Don't belittle your spouse in public or private.

    48. Our children knew our marriage bed was where mommy and daddy slept, not them. I know this is controversial, but it was important in our marriage.

    49. Buy a lock for your bedroom door. Especially necessary when living with teens (for their sake and yours!).

    50. Always seek to glorify God in your marriage! Your marriage is not about you, but about God's glory.

    51. Every morning consider ways you can make like better for your spouse that day.

    52. Attend church together.

    53. Read the New Testament together one chapter a day.

    54. Encourage each other to never give up!

    55. Have patience with each other through the changing seasons of marriage.

I'm so glad we held on to each other when our marriage almost fell apart. Enduring love is the best! 

Happy Anniversary to us! Remembering the splashes of serenity and forgetting the mud and muck, we press on!

Is Your Spouse Getting on Your Nerves?

While you and your honey shelter in place, are you thinking I'm ready to shelter my honey off to another place! Be encouraged today as I share the first chapter from We All Married Idiots: Three Things You Will Never Change About Your Marriage and Ten Things You Can. 

My gift to you as Dan and I celebrate the 50th anniversary of the day we met!



Treasure your days together!

2020 Extraordinary Faith Summit

Has your marriage hit the wall? Ours did. I'm excited to share how an extraordinary God kept us running our marriage race through the obstacles and through the wall to glorify Him with our marriage. #Married50Years this year! #SoGladWeStayed 

You won't want to miss this two week conference of extraordinary speakers and writers who trusted an extraordinary God to pull them through extraordinary circumstances (beginning March 2, 2020). My segment is live on Wednesday, March 4, 2020 at 3:00 EST. Details below.

Here's a Sneak Peek at The 2020 Extraordinary Faith Summit hosted by Marketers On A Mission​. It begins Monday, March 2nd / ends on Friday, March 13th. (Click image to enlarge.)

Please welcome our guests Dr. Michelle Bengtson, Linda Evans Shepherd, Elaine W. Miller, Shonda Savage Whitworth, Twila Belk - The Gotta Tell Somebody Gal, Melinda V Inman, Evelyn Kraemer Mann, Eva Marie Everson's Southern Novels, Katherine B. Barner, and Lynne Hartke, Author.

You can enroll (it's FREE!) and be encouraged by these sessions all year long! Details at: https://marketersonamission.com/ext-faith-2020/ — with Michelle Bengtson, Melinda Inman, Linda Evans Shepherd, Elaine W. Miller, Shonda Savage Whitworth, Lynne Hartke and Twila Belk.

Beyond the Surface Conference on Finding, Keeping, Fixing Friendships

Tired of shallow relationships? 

Me too. 

Join me 

for a women's one-day conference 

June 22, 2019, 9:00 a.m. to 2:00 p.m. 

Trinity Alliance Church, 

1275 Spencerport Road, Rochester, NY 

   a

BEYOND THE SURFACE

Finding Friendships 

Keeping Friendships

Fixing Friendships

For reservations and more information please click t     https://www.facebook.com/events/861249397544552/

 What an opportunity for friendships to go beyond the surface. 

Dive in and make your reservation today! 

Bring your friends!!! 

Love you! 

See you there!

" . . . love one another deeply, from the heart"

(1 Peter 1:22)

 For the glory of God with lots of splashes of serenity!

Elaine W. Miller Meet and Greet at SE Steuben County Library

I am excited! All are invited! It's been too long since I've seen some of you. Please join me this Saturday and let's enjoy some time together.

Elaine W. Miller 

Meet and Greet and Book Signing

at 

Southeast Steuben Library

300 Nasser Civic Center Plaza

Corning, NY

Saturday, March 23, 2019

1:00 to 3:00 p. m.

What joy for me to meet and greet you this Saturday! Thank you SE Steuben Library for hosting this event. Have you been to a library lately? They are awesome!!!

Elaine W. Miller Shares How Cancer Changed Her Heart on Keepin' It Real Interview

Does cancer change your life? Absolutely. In many ways cancer makes one's life richer, fuller, brighter, and deeper.  Listen to Lisa Buske and Elaine chat girlfriend-to-girlfriend about her latest book Praise the Lord and Pass the Chemo! satan did all he could to disrupt this interview, so the first 19 minutes are a bit broken up in places. The last half has blessings you will not want to miss.

Please click below to listen.https://l.facebook.com/l.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fanchor.fm%2Flisa-buske%2Fembed%2Fepisodes%2FInterview-with-Author-Elaine-W-Miller-e2sh78%2Fa-a8gh4e%3Ffbclid%3DIwAR2RKnCmbqqtA6fWcqY6v7KrpAv_ET178efaqmdQaPxTgFuSxUzeCC5sZDg&h=AT3xgsSnn-ynMvYk3Rlkqoijddrw90mQlGwBcavzqBpsMYToba6dGiWdLCLYD60oExFrz49b2S9OWOLBJy9UTMqNtyS1UYQ4vNj9AyY6C_2l0pRj_fGyM-oQg0bqglLrlQ



Thank you Lisa Buske for your heart for the hurting. Lisa's life changed the day her sister Heidi was abducted. The most awful experience of her life made her, in many ways, richer, fuller, brighter, and deeper. Lisa's book Where's Heidi will encourage any going through the worst of times. To learn more about Lisa Buske and listen to other "Keepin' It Real" podcasts, please hit

https://l.facebook.com/l.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.lisambuske.com%2Fblog%2Fmeet-todays-podcast-guestelaine-w-miller%3Ffbclid%3DIwAR1hLXi57K4VAyMB4LyzL91FJWxla_o5apgsEDu7ez7k2u4KvGJSSH7-oxM&h=AT2ajmW09q5J7aZ4bCb7PsZHt37aXw607foqYLjApgj21Pxo00N76kLKktMaUJcpLK8rnHyIJ2kNm1RMpLZT9SSBIFbKTNt2z-BqQJ_sVE3x0zNsBVKLLUA3vWzlu7xqAQ

Troubles open our eyes to priorities and fill us with compassion for the hurting. God promises in Deuteronomy 23:5

. . . the Lord your God . . . turned the curse into a blessing for you, 

because the Lord your God loves you.

Which is why we have A Hopeful Response to A Hard Reality and we can say Praise the Lord and Pass the Chemo. Whatever life throws us, bring it on! God has won the victory!

My love and prayers for all hurting today,

The Worst of Times—A Child Has Cancer

"Two thoughts came to mind when I heard my diagnosis,

First, for the glory of God.

Second, I'm thankful I have cancer and not one of my children. 

"Having cancer takes courage. 

Watching your child suffer takes surrender."

 from the chapter,

                                "The Worst of Times—A Child Has Cancer" 

in my book,

Praise the Lord and Pass the Chemo: 
A Hopeful Response to A Hard Diagnosis.

If your child has cancer, my heart breaks for you. I know a little of what your family is going through because my baby brother had cancer. Nine months old. Six months to live. I was sixteen.

 Kaboom! 

Our family exploded in shock and grief. Don't give up hope. Although you are experiencing every parent's worst nightmare, there is a hopeful response to the hard reality of childhood cancer. 

I devoted the longest chapter in my new book, 
Praise the Lord and Pass the Chemo: A Hopeful Response to a Hard Reality, 
to the hard realities of childhood cancer. 
Although hard, there is hope. 
The hopeful response comes from my own testimony of the good that God brought to our family because we knew pain. 
In this chapter I share wise words from brave mothers 
whose babies lived and some who died with childhood disease. 
These  moms know suffering we know not of, and have wisdom that comes from God.

September is Childhood Cancer Awareness month. If your child has cancer or any disease, or if you know of a family watching their child suffer, please gift them with a copy of Praise the Lord and Pass the Chemo: A Hopeful Response to a Hard Reality. 

Coming soon to this website, but available on Amazon now at https://www.amazon.com/Praise-Lord-Pass-Chemo-Response/dp/1945976012/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1537908119&sr=1-1&keywords=praise+the+lord+and+pass+the+chemo 

The American Childhood Cancer Organization says, "A diagnosis turns the lives of the entire family upside down." https://www.acco.org/childhood-cancer-awareness-month/

Childhood disease puts great stress on every aspect of a marriage. Never before have husbands and wives needed each other, but never before have some of them felt so distant as they suffer privately instead of together. I suggest gifting the couples with We All  Married Idiots: Three Things You Will Never Change About Your Marriage and Ten Things You Can. They'll have a few laughs and share some unexpected kisses, which will bless their lives as well as the life of their child.

Available on this website or on Amazon at https://www.amazon.com/We-All-Married-Idiots-Marriage/dp/0984765522/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1537907841&sr=1-1&keywords=we+all+married+idiots

Praying for Splashes of Serenity on families who suffer,

Mentoring is not a Suggestion. Mentoring is a Command!

Mentoring! Mentoring! Mentoring! I keep hearing the word "mentoring" at conferences, in conversations, in books, and speaking invitations.

Jayme Hull, author of Face to Face: Discovering How Mentoring Can Change Your Life  interviewed me recently on her podcast. Seehttp://www.jaymeleehull.com/podcast/ep-17-encouragement-marriages-elaine-w-miller/

Michelle Lazurek asked me to speak on mentoring at Coudersport Alliance Church's Spring banquet.

A month ago I commented on a blog and won Janet Thompson's book Mentoring for All Seasons.

All right God. You have my attention.

Janet Thompson's Mentoring for All Seasons opened my eyes to truth. Titus 2 doesn't encourage us to mentor younger women if we feel like it or we can fit mentoring into our busy days. 

Mentoring isn't a suggestion. 

Mentoring is a command! 

   "These older women must train the younger women 

to love their husbands and their children,

to live wisely and be pure. . . " 

Titus 2:4-5 (NLT)

Please notice the words "must train." Not perhaps train or find time to train or feel qualified to train but "must train."  

We must step up to this task and obey God's command to train the younger women. For if we don't, who will? Social media? Hollywood? satan? They will and they do. 

Let us not sit back trusting God for our Christian sisters and daughters 

while the world equips them with and encourages them towards ungodliness.

Mentoring  for All Seasons  takes the fear out of mentoring as a complete easy-to-understand, fun-to-read mentoring handbook. Janet Thompson walks the reader through every season and possible circumstance of life, making mentoring easy with tips and testimonies, Biblical examples, questions to ask, and resources to use. Thank you Janet Thompson for an excellent resource as well as admonition to reach younger generations for Christ. 

Psst: Did you notice Titus 2 says, "train the younger women to love their husbands"? In Mentoring for All Seasons, Janet Thompson encourages us to sit down with young wives and mentor them in marriage. She recommends We All Married Idiots: Three Things You Will Never Change About Your Marriage and Ten Things You Can as a book that would be fun and easy to  use to mentor wives and those who hope to be wives. Thanks Janet for the shout out. What a sweet surprise!

Splash some serenity on a younger woman and mentor them towards God! You'll feel some of those splashes too. Promise.

Elaine W. Miller Shares Her God Story, Her Marriage, Her Writing Life

What joy to share my God story, the salvation of my marriage, our call to ministry, my call to write, and the miracles God did along the way with my friend Jayme Hull. You can listen to our conversation on Jayme's Face to Face Mentoring Show at http://www.jaymeleehull.com/podcast/ep-17-encouragement-marriages-elaine-w-miller/

Jayme Hull is a dynamic speaker and passionate mentor who motivates audiences to invest in others through mentoring. The author of Face to Face: Discovering How Mentoring Can Change Your Life, Jayme and I met at Montrose Christian Writer's Conference and immediately connected as kindred spirits. She's fun and fabulous with huge energy and great love for her Lord Jesus Christ.

Learn more about Jayme on her website, www.jaymeleehull.com

May this interview pour splashes of serenity and floods of hope for your marriage this Valentine's Day!

Christmas Special! No Postage! I'll Pay the Tax!

Dear friends,

The prayer of my heart this Christmas is that God will restore broken marriages and fractured families. We are in a fight against satan whose desire is to destroy us and those we love.

Thirty-seven years ago I was ready to give up and walk out. I shudder thinking what my life would have been like had I obeyed satan and left the husband I have loved for over 40 years.
My decision to turn to God and honor my wedding vows is written with three different perspectives in my three books.

My Merry Christmas gift to you is to offer each book for $12 total. I'll pay the tax and the postage. Please message me on facebook or email me at SplashesofSerenity@yahoo.com with your order.

With thanks to God for restoring my marriage and prayers that God will work in the hearts and families of all reading the books He gave me to write to you.

May your marriage and family have their best Christmas ever!