What a Difference a Day Makes! The Miller's Christmas Letter

What a difference a day makes. One day we're celebrating our 50th wedding anniversary (Yes, Dan fit into his 1970 Navy uniform and no, my wedding gown did not zip in the back. But still.) We had a blast.

The next month covid-19 hit our home and remains three months later.  Nothing could hide our joy when I was able to walk to my second floor hospital window and see my Dan for the first time in three weeks. 

Time. Time has been on my mind a lot these days. It seems like from day one this pandemic season has lost us time. Days. Weeks. Months. Or has it? The Bible (and the Byrds) say ". . . there is a season, and a time for every purpose under Heaven."

Season. Time. Purpose. As I dig deep into memories of  2020, I pray we never miss a day, a season, a time, or a purpose. Time is only wasted when we waste it. For God has a purpose for every good and difficult day of our lives. How we live life, our attitudes, the growth or the grumbles we choose are ours. Today (and everyday) let us fill our hearts with thankfulness and praise to the One who blesses us with time, with seasons, and with purpose.

Thank you to all who prayed during my 25 day stay in hospital isolation with Covid-19. My mind had lots of time to ponder the truth that there is a time to live and a time to die. I thank Jesus for His peace that indwelled me realizing this could be my time to die, but I had nothing to fear. God forgave my sins, Jesus took the punishment for my sins on the cross, and God promises eternal life to me and to all who believe. In life and in death, we have nothing to fear if we know Jesus.

You prayed me home into the arms of my dear husband who is now my caretaker. Dan's kindness, gentleness, patience, and good cooking are a blessing as we embrace this season of our marriage together. Covid damaged my lungs and I remain weak, breathless, and my lungs are unable to produce sufficient oxygen. Please continue your prayers as we trust God for healing in my lungs. My doctors say this is a six-month healing process. I'm learning to live with an oxygen tank and will celebrate with a big breath when a tank is no longer an accessory to my wardrobe. 

Our children make a joyful difference in our days. We are blessed by them.

Joanna and Bob live in a world of teenagers adjusting to going to school and learning at home. Ryan missed most of a cancelled baseball season (sad) and Gracie has a boyfriend (happy). 

Elizabeth and Joe will welcome baby #10 this summer. Connor is engaged to Jessica  (sweet and fun couple) and Garrett joined the Army.

 Sam and Katie moved to S. Dakota with the Air Force where they live five minutes from a fishing stream (God answers his prayers. Ha Ha!). We marvel at Katie's, Lily's, and Jack's ability to adjust and embrace the military family's life.

Today (and everyday) let us fill our hearts with thankfulness and praise to the One who blesses us with time, with seasons, with purpose, with salvation through His Son Jesus Christ, and the day that changed all days — Christmas!  

What a difference Christmas Day made! One day the Word became flesh and dwelt among us as the only begotten of the Father. One day God sent us His Son that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life. The day I believed in Jesus Christ and gave my life to Him. What a difference that day made for me!

 Blessed Christmas dear ones.

Elaine and Dan

The Night I Fell in Love with Dan Miller

Planning our 50th wedding anniversary, my mind floods with memories and joy. God's purpose for us was so much more than we dreamed or expected fifty years ago. With thanks to God for His Goodness to us all the days of our lives, I share the moments when God's plan was sealed. God must chuckle as He orchestrates the love story in each of our lives.

 Dan was a blind date that didn't go very well. I never stopped talking. He never stopped listening, but he didn't say too much. (I learned later that this is a good quality.) At the time, I figured his silence was an indication of his disappointment in the girl he envisioned when he asked to see me before he had even seen me. (Of course,  in 1970 facebook and internet and cell phones did not exist.) A blind date really was a blind date. 

To my surprise, he asked to see me again. To my greater surprise, I said, "Alright." Date number two was a little worse than date number one.  I pre-decided not to do all the talking, so we pretty much didn't talk. He was a gentleman, I'll give him that credit. He made no attempt to hold my hand or kiss me goodnight. I wondered, Was he a gentleman, or did the thought of touching my hand repulse him? I did not know. We parted after two dates with no invitation for a third and my intent to refuse another encounter if asked. 

The phone call came on Tuesday, "Would you like to go out to dinner and to Ford Theatre to see The Fantasticks?" 

Please understand. I was a young, single girl working at the Treasury Department in Washington, D.C. My paychecks came in, and my paychecks went out, mostly for new clothes. Food was not a budget item. So, if a young man asked me out to dinner, I grabbed the opportunity to eat. Plus, theatre was in the deal. Win! Win!

Ninety degrees in April in D.C. is unusual, but that was the weather. Dressed for a special evening, Dan picked me up after work. He wore a wool sports coat and looked quite fine. We dined in an elegant restaurant. Now, I hadn't eaten for two days due to my money mismanagement. I ordered several large items. Dan's eyes were big and his expression unbelief. This night while I was busy eating, Dan did all the talking and his words were kind, funny, and pleasant. 

"Are you ready to go to the play?" He said after our lengthy meal.

"I haven't had dessert!" 

 I'm assuming that's the moment he fell in love with me. I learned later that Dan really likes a girl who can eat! He denies it, but I remember him joking one day and telling someone he married me because I was the only girl who could eat more than him!

We ordered dessert and enjoyed sweet food and conversation.

In 1970 Ford Theatre had not been renovated. The seats were the same as the night President Lincoln was assassinated — small and close together. Ninety degrees outside meant even higher temperatures inside this non-air-conditioned theatre. The heat hit my wool-coat-clad date hard. Drops of sweat beaded on his forehead and proceeded down his face for the rest of the night. 

When we arrived at our reserved seats, our hearts sunk a bit. One seat had a perfect view of the stage. The other seat had a large round column from ceiling to floor directly in front. Without hesitation, Dan moved into the obstructed seat. For the rest of the evening, his legs straddled the column, as his perspiration-soaked head swerved to the right and to the left attempting to catch a glimpse of the play.

 

Not one word of complaint came from Dan's mouth. In fact, he never even mentioned our seats were bad, or his face was hot, or his date ate too much. His purpose that night was to assure me a lovely evening. Mission complete. He stole my heart, as my mind filled with the thoughts of, this is a quality guy. That thought was sealed when he left me at my door with no kiss or expressed desire to come into my apartment. 

Five weeks later we were engaged. Five months later we wed. Dan lived Philippians 2:3-4 then and he hasn't faltered in fifty years of making my desires more important than his own. When a wife returns that affection, you've got a win-win marriage!

"Don't be selfish; don't try to impress others. 

Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. 

Don't look out only for your own interests, 

but take an interest in others too."

Philippians 2:3-4 (NLT) 

I often say I married Dan because he was the kindest person I've ever met. I said it then. I say it now. With thanksgiving and praise to God who brought two idiots together in love for a lifetime.  

Fifty Years of Stains Washed Away

Fifty years ago, in a hurry to begin my married life and enjoy our wedding night, I carelessly threw my wedding gown (stained with wedding reception food, mascara dripping tears, and lipstick kisses that missed my cheeks) into a bag. Except for the few times my daughters and granddaughters played bride, the dress remained untouched and the stains stayed intact.

Next week we celebrate our Fiftieth Anniversary. For fifty years we've dreamed of this day and wondered if we would make it alive and/or still married. We are both alive, still married, and rejoicing at the blessing and satisfaction fifty years of marriage brings. An accomplishment we are thrilled to celebrate. Stay together dear ones. Marriage is worth it. 

For years we've discussed how we will celebrate this marriage milestone. "I'll take you anywhere in the world you want to go." Dan would. He loves to travel. But, here we are in a pandemic. Still quarantined due to my cancer and compromised immune system, we sit in Campbell, NY, population 320. Just the two of us sitting on a hill. What a blessing this time has been for us. No interruptions, meetings, deadlines. The pandemic was a gift of time. Time to talk. And pray. Really share about life and our joys and sorrows. We've had conversations we never would have had except we were shut in a house together for months not permitted to leave. I am thankful.

We haven't been in a store or a restaurant (or had a haircut) since February. I'm told to stay home. So I do. But, what about our anniversary? Can't travel. Can't dine out. In my pandemic world filled with "do not's," there are things we can do. Instead of ho-humming it,  Dan and I are planning a party in our home to celebrate with our children and grandchildren. I can't think of a lovelier way to celebrate the blessings of our marriage than with the gifts of family God gave to us. 

Now, back to the dress. I found my wedding dress (complete with stains) still in the same bag 50 years hence. Thinking the wedding dress should be a decoration for our party, I decided to wash it. What does it matter if it falls apart? I'll throw the dress and the veil in the washing machine (gentle cycle). 

Voila! I couldn't believe it! Just like that, all the stains were washed away. The dress and veil looks brand new. 

My first thought: Isn't that like marriage and isn't that like God. Marriage has stains. Ugly words we wish we had never said. A flirtatious wink we wish we could take back. Sin stains our lives, our marriages, our families, our testimonies. Sin stains. But God says, 

"'Come now, let us settle this,' says the Lord. 'Though your sins are like scarlet, I will make them as white as snow.'" Isaiah 1:18

Just like my wedding dress, we can be cleaned by the precious blood of Jesus Christ. Fifty years, 5 years, or 5 minutes of sins in marriage can be washed away in less time than a wash cycle. 

"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." 1 John 1:9 

Let Jesus free you from the pandemic of sin. Ask His forgiveness, ask your beloved's forgiveness, turn from your wrong ways and enjoy the beauty of a new life and a fresh start to your marriage. The best anniversary news I could receive is that someone reads this, confesses their sin, and gives their heart and their marriage to Jesus.

Happy 50th Anniversary to us!