Tuesday, June 20, 2017

How to Lead a Successful "We All Married Idiots" Couples' Study

Happy Dance! That's what I do when people contact me asking for guidance because their small group wants to study We All Married Idiots. Why so happy? Because I know when couples come together under the teaching of God's Word on marriage, only good can come from that meeting. God is glorified and satan is crushed. Families are saved and children grow up in happy homes. Wow! Wouldn't that make you dance too!

So, how does one lead a successful We All Married Idiots study? Easy. Application and study questions are provided under "CHANGE" at the end of each chapter. Start there and watch God "change" marriages.

How do those CHANGE questions play out in a small group? I contacted Annette Hurlbut from the Fulton Alliance Church, knowing she and her husband had lead a successful study of We All Married Idiots. How do I know it was successful? Throughout the study, couples contacted me sharing the changes  happening in individuals and in marriages. The grand prize being one of the couples renewing their wedding vows. Woo Hoo!!! A thrill to this author's heart.

Annette sent me lots of info. I'll share some below, but she is willing to share all the handouts she prepared, including the invitation she sent to couples challenging them to "Ask your spouse, 'Are you willing to study the Bible as it pertains to marriage—and our growth as a couple?'"

Why was the Hurlbut's small group effective?

1.  Ownership: From the beginning each participant took ownership. The couples were asked to look over We All Married Idiots and choose a chapter they would like to lead over the next thirteen weeks. During the meeting the lead couple discussed points in the chapter that touched their hearts and their marriage and asked the other couples to share their thoughts. As a group they answered the questions at the end of each chapter, sharing prayer requests, and praying for each other's marriage.

2. Fun: Midway through the study they took a break and had a date night. What a way to laugh and have fun and enjoy each other. I suspect there were a lot of laughs throughout the study, as well.

3. Fruit: Each week they discussed the changes happening in their marriages. What an encouragement to keep working at it.

4. Commitment: Could a marriage study get better than ending with a marriage vow renewal?

To guide you on your way to a successful small group couples study, here's the time format Mary and her husband used:

6:15 - 6:35: Fellowship, snacks, prayer/share and CHANGE application from previous week.

6:35 - 7:45: Read chapter. Meditate. Reflect. Change. (YOUR CHANGE homework).

7:45 - 8:00: Prayer requests.

If you would like more information or the handouts from Annette Hurlbut, please email her at   aahurlbut@aol.com.

Go ahead. You can lead a small group study of We All Married Idiots. What a thrill watching couples grow in love with their Savior and with each other. I'd love to pray for you and for your group as you meet. Let me know, and I'll be on my knees for your marriage.

A splash of serenity isn't enough for a marriage, Lord. I want a water fall of serenity, Jesus. A water fall.



  1. Thank you for sharing specific ways to lead a group on this! Love these ideas. Thank you, Elaine (and Annette)!

  2. Annette did a super job and God grew the marriages. What a blessing to all.


I would love hearing from you! Thanks for sharing!