Friday, March 22, 2019

Facing Cancer "with Grit, Gumption, and the Grace of God"

 Who knew a journalist would be in the audience when I spoke at the 
First Trinity Evangelical Lutheran Church in Wellsville, NY? 

God knew. 
That's Who knew.

Thank you Laurie Dashnau for a fabulous article. 
(See article below)
 You fulfilled what every speaker/author dreams of
—a person of influence who writes glowing reviews of their work—
without being asked. 
So nice seeing you and your dear husband and meeting your enthusiastic neighbor. 

Thank you Marsha Sick and the evangelism team at First Trinity Evangelical Lutheran.
 I admire your vision to minister to cancer patients. 
What a delight sharing the day with suffering saints desiring to have all of God. 

Thank You God for always putting us at the right place
 at the right time with the right people. 
Our ministries are truly in Your Hands.
May we shine for You!

"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men . . . .
 It is the Lord Christ you are serving." Colossians 3:23-24

Thank you dear prayer warriors. 
Because of your prayers I spy God sightings in my life. 
Thanks for holding up my arms!


Wednesday, March 20, 2019

Elaine W. Miller Meet and Greet at SE Steuben County Library

I am excited! All are invited! It's been too long since I've seen some of you. Please join me this Saturday and let's enjoy some time together.

Elaine W. Miller 

Meet and Greet and Book Signing


Southeast Steuben Library

300 Nasser Civic Center Plaza

Corning, NY

Saturday, March 23, 2019

1:00 to 3:00 p. m.

What joy for me to meet and greet you this Saturday! Thank you SE Steuben Library for hosting this event. Have you been to a library lately? They are awesome!!!


Tuesday, March 19, 2019

Splashes of Serenity: Why God Allows Suffering

Splashes of Serenity: Why God Allows Suffering: My Pastor Dave Bretch asked if he could interview me and Barry Karschner regarding my suffering with cancer and the Karschner's str...


Monday, March 18, 2019

Why God Allows Suffering

My Pastor Dave Bretch asked if he could interview me and Barry Karschner regarding my suffering with cancer and the Karschner's struggle with infertility. Be blessed as Barry and I share our stories, our sorrows, and our joys in the Sunday morning services at Beartown Road Alliance Church.

Keep your eyes fixed on Jesus, always,


Thursday, February 14, 2019

Ten Ways To Put More Love and More Life Into Your Love Life

My book's title, We All Married Idiots, grabs people's attention. But the meat of this book is found in the sub-title, Three Things You Will Never Change About Your Marriage and Ten Things You Can.

Using the chapter titles of the Ten Things You Can, I hope you enjoy my spin on the ten ways you can put more love and more life into your love life. Have fun!

1. Loosen Up! Ask someone what first attracted them to their spouse and the answer may be, "Their smile." So loosen up! Laugh! Smile! Nothing says "Kiss me!" more than a happy face.

2. Strip Down! Oops! Did I say that? No. God did. In Hebrews 12:1 (NLT) He says,
 ". . . let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up."
We need to strip ourselves of sin that makes us unattractive to God and to our lovers. Sins like grumbling, lust, anger . . . all sin; you name it, keeps our bedrooms from being the happy place God intended.

3. Let Go! Thoughts of  laundry to do, Billy's homework isn't done, what should I make for dinner, problems at the office, all can occupy our minds during love making.  Don't bring your "to do" list to the bedroom. I guarantee while making love, you won't be able to do any of it. So, let go of these thoughts, concentrate on your lover, and enjoy!

4. Hold On! Your honey wants to get frisky, but your honey's character flaws turn you off. No one is perfect. Don't let thoughts of your sweetheart's failures enter your mind while making love. This is the time to hold on to the good and remember all the wonderful traits you love about your spouse.

5. Settle Down! Angry? Well, settle down. Anger has no place in your marriage bed.  Sexual abstinence will not solve your marital difficulties. Settle anger outside the bedroom walls because your bedroom is reserved as your play ground not your boxing ring.

6. Make Nice! Making nice is foreplay for the night ahead. No one wants to make love with a mate who makes mean. Remember, your lover desires to be treasured, not trampled.

7. Cheer On! If you want an example of cheering on your lover during lovemaking, read Solomon's Song of Songs. Wow! For example, "How beautiful you are, my darling! Oh, how beautiful! Your eyes are doves. How handsome you are, my lover! Oh, how charming! And our bed is verdant." Song of Songs 1: 15-16. Words of affection and affirmation do much to cheer your honey on toward sexual pleasure.

8. Sit Tight! There really are times your beloved has a headache. Understanding and treating your love  tenderly during "headache" days will reap future rewards in your love life. Sit tight, be patient, and wait for a better day.

9. Give up! There will be days you won't desire your spouse, but your spouse desires you. I suggest you give up and ask God to give you passion for your husband or wife.  God says, "Husbands and wives should satisfy each other's sexual needs . . . Don't withhold yourselves from each other unless you agree to do so for a set time to devote yourselves to prayer. Then you should get back together. . . " 1 Corinthians 7: 3, 5. Prayer is an amazing power God gives to us. As we pray and invite God into our bedroom, asking The Almighty to help us respond to our lover's desires, we may be shocked at His answer. Prayer before and during lovemaking is the best foreplay of all. God wants to bless your marriage bed. He really does! Just ask Him.

10. Look up! The sparks aren't flying. There's no desire at all. Now what should you do? Look up! Ask God to help you and your beloved enjoy sexual intimacy as He planned for a husband and a wife. Loosen up, strip down, let go, hold on, settle down, make nice, cheer on, sit tight, give up, and look up. I suspect God will give you a marriage relationship better than you ever asked or imagined.

I have a passion for marriages, which is why I love promoting my book, We All Married Idiots: Three Things You Will Never Change About Your Marriage and Ten Things You Can. Available wherever books are sold and on Amazon at

Splashes of Serenity and joy prayed for you and your beloved!

Happy Valentine's Day!


Thursday, February 7, 2019

Praise the Lord and Pass the Chemo Book Give Away in Memory of Joe Tolpa

Thank you to all who entered the give away and thank you especially for your prayers for the Tolpa family. If you are on a cancer journey, you have my heart and I will pray for you. The winners of two free copies of Praise the Lord and Pass the Chemo are

Nan Ripley
Cheryl Engle

Yea!!! I'm so happy for you two and pray God will bless your lives through the words He gave me while writing A Hopeful Response to A Hard Reality

Our friend and a fellow cancer warrior ran his victory lap to Heaven last November. Joe Tolpa praised the Lord through all his chemo, so in memory of Joe, I am giving away two copies of Praise the Lord and Pass the Chemo: A Hopeful Response to a Hard Reality. 

Enter the give-away by sharing this blog or a photo of Praise the Lord and Pass the Chemo on your social media sites and by saying a prayer for Pat, Alyssa, and Joshua. Please, you must let me know you shared, so I can enter your name in the drawing. Two winners will be chosen on Wednesday, February 13, 2018. Bonus! Every time you share Praise the Lord and Pass the Chemo on your social media, your name will be entered to win. Please let me know on facebook messenger or my email,

Joe lived the victorious Christian life when he was healthy and while he was sick. What joy to talk to him and be blessed with his outlook on life and cancer and death.

Joe blessed me with an interview for my book Praise the Lord and Pass the Chemo: A Hopeful Response to a Hard Reality. Cancer gave him a new perspective for living life. He praised God for the time he had left and that God gave him more months to live and love than doctors predicted. Thankful that God alerted him of his death, he made precious moments with his dear wife Pat and precious children Alyssa and Josh. Joe said,

"Without cancer, I would have been too busy working
 and not made some great memories with my family." 

Dear Pat, Alyssa, and Josh, how he loved you. I know those memories will hold your husband and father near to your heart.

 So, in memory of Joe, I am giving away two free copies of Praise the Lord and Pass the Chemo.  

JOSEPH A. TOLPA JR. Age 54 of Horseheads , NY formerly of New Hartford , NY passed away on Monday November 19 , 2018 peacefully at home with his family at his side after a long hard fought battle with cancer. Joe was born in Utica , NY on July 23 , 1964 the son of Joseph A. and Betty Jane Oleksik Tolpa. He was pre-deceased by his mother Betty. Joe is survived by his loving and devoted wife Patricia L. Hopkins Tolpa ; his children Alyssa L. Tolpa and Joshua A. Tolpa ; his father : Joseph A. Tolpa Sr. ; brothers and sisters : William & Ann Tolpa , Kathy & Rick Purcell , Karen & Steve Vedete , and Suzanne & Joe Hughes ; father-in-law and mother-in-law : Allan & Arlene Hopkins ; brothers-in-law and sisters-in-law : Thomas & Rebecca Hopkins , and David Hopkins ; several aunts , uncles , nieces , nephews , cousins and a host of caring friends . Joe spent most of his life in healthcare as a nursing home administrator and a registered nurse. Most recently working at Absolut Care at Three Rivers . Joe also had an entreprenueral spirit , owning TruBlu Services for many years. Joe always felt it was important to give back to the community. He spent many years volunteering for different organizations . The list includes Rutland Lions Club , Pregnancy Resource Centers in Rutland , VT and Elmira , NY , Cub Scouts Pack 41 and Boy Scouts Troop 3041 of Horseheads, NY , as well as being a Deacon at Maranatha Bible Chapel . He was a proud recipient of the Lions Club Melvin Jones Fellow Award for his community service. Joe lived life to the fullest , spending time with family and friends. He loved the outdoors , hiking, camping , boating , skiing , and motorcycle riding .

Splashes of Serenity on  your day! 


Monday, January 21, 2019

Elaine W. Miller Shares How Cancer Changed Her Heart on Keepin' It Real Interview

Does cancer change your life? Absolutely. In many ways cancer makes one's life richer, fuller, brighter, and deeper.  Listen to Lisa Buske and Elaine chat girlfriend-to-girlfriend about her latest book Praise the Lord and Pass the Chemo! satan did all he could to disrupt this interview, so the first 19 minutes are a bit broken up in places. The last half has blessings you will not want to miss.

Please click below to listen.

Thank you Lisa Buske for your heart for the hurting. Lisa's life changed the day her sister Heidi was abducted. The most awful experience of her life made her, in many ways, richer, fuller, brighter, and deeper. Lisa's book Where's Heidi will encourage any going through the worst of times. To learn more about Lisa Buske and listen to other "Keepin' It Real" podcasts, please hit

Troubles open our eyes to priorities and fill us with compassion for the hurting. God promises in Deuteronomy 23:5

. . . the Lord your God . . . turned the curse into a blessing for you, 
because the Lord your God loves you.

Which is why we have A Hopeful Response to A Hard Reality and we can say Praise the Lord and Pass the Chemo. Whatever life throws us, bring it on! God has won the victory!

My love and prayers for all hurting today,