My journal entry written the day I learned I had cancer made me laugh out loud. I hope you are encouraged reading my unedited thoughts. Go ahead. Have a laugh on me.
So pretty. So feminine.
It almost sounds like a young maiden's name.
I think I'll call you Leu on days you treat me spunky—like a hurricane roaring through my body.
On pleasant days I'll call you Mia and sing,
I just met a girl named Leukemia.
And suddenly I see how beautiful the world can be.
Say it loud and there's music playing.
Say it soft and it's almost like praying.
How true. If I have to die of a disease, I'm glad it has a pretty name like Leukemia.
A name that makes my death the beautiful event it will be as God takes my hand and ushers me to
My eternal home—
the place I was born to live—
where there are no more tears or pain and I will enjoy beauty as I've never seen before.
I'm glad I won't die of rheumatoid or arthritis or heart attack or tuberculosis or blood clot or alzheimers, train wreck, or car crash.
I will make my exit arm in arm with the lovely Leukemia."
Ha! Only God could give me a sense of humor, total peace, and a song when my world came tumbling down.
Truly God did not lie when He promised me in Isaiah 43:1-3 (NIV):
". . . 'Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by name;
you are mine.
When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.
For I am the Lord, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior . . ."
PS: Surely, I am laughing at leukemia because God is choosing to keep me on this earth longer than we first expected. My blood counts are normal and we anticipate years before my exit with the grand belle leukemia. Thanks for your prayers.